Season 3, Episode 2
In this episode, we are joined by our amazing friend and member of Black Forest Community Church, Captain Alivia Stehlik. Alivia is an active duty Army officer currently serving as the physical therapist for a brigade combat team at Fort Carson. She is a graduate of West Point and Ranger School, a former infantry platoon leader, and a veteran of the war in Afghanistan. She's also a proud transgender woman. In February 2019, she testified about her experiences as a transgender woman in the army before the House Armed Services Subcommittee on Military Personnel. She has since continued to advocate for her trans military peers, as well as conduct education and advocacy for the LGBTQ community locally and around the country. In this 2nd episode of season 3, Alivia shares her own stories of social action and where she finds her own seeds of devotion. She also gives us a practical and super helpful guide to Trans Etiquette.
Resources!
Alivia shared the music that’s speaking to her right now. Click here to check out Vitamin String Quartet!
Check out this Open Letter to the Women of Firsts
Here’s Alivia’s list of Trans Etiquette Guidelines:
Terminology:
- Transgender (not transgenders or transgendered or transvestite or transsexual - though this last one may be slightly generational)
- Trans/transgender people (not transgenders)
- Trans man = female to male = assigned female at birth = a man ~= he/him/his
- Trans woman = male to female = assigned male at birth = a woman ~= she/her/hers
- Non-binary = someone who falls outside of the binary gender spectrum. May use a variety of different pronouns, including they/them/theirs
- Intersex = people born with any of several variations in sex characteristics including chromosomes, gonads, sex hormones, or genitals that do not fit the typical definitions for male or female bodies. Intersex people may or may not identify as transgender.
DO:
-If you’re not sure about someone’s pronouns, it’s ok to ask. In professional settings, get used to introducing yourself with your own pronouns. It normalizes it for everyone else.
-USE OUR PRONOUNS. If you mess up, apologize briefly and move on - no need to dwell
Don’t:
-Ask about surgeries
-Ask if our families are ok with us
-Ask what our real/old/dead name is
-Ask us what our biological sex is
-Ask if you can ask us a personal question - if you wouldn’t want to be asked the same question, it’s not polite.
